Fate and Reason's

Its difficult to see someone you love 

not care 

about

you .

Truly your's

Stupid Juliet / Syed Abdullah

This is what i had for lunch today .

One Double Whopper ! (yummmmy )

One Normal Size Whopper that i got for free (I was already full when i ate this)

Yummy Fries is a must !

a Big glass of coke ! What a throat teaser ! :B

Lastly 3 curry puffs . Im stuffed !

Im totally full as of right now , im pretty sure ill be full till late night lol . What ive been doing here ? Ive been downloading The Lord Of the Ring online which is a huge download file ! Total size is 10 , 458 MB . God damn thats going to take forever , On top of that i got ..

Im currently messaging this sweet sweet girl . Been keeping me company since last night . Well what am i going to do after i complete this blog ? probly go to bed ! cheers everyone !

Yours truly 

Stupid Romeo / Syed Abdullah

I think im ready to move on ..

I think im ready .

Ive changed to be a better person .

Im not the same guy i was 3years ago .

I deserve someone who is going to love me back .

marry me .

Start a family with me .

I loved you .

But you wasted it .

You wasted me .

You wasted my effort .

I wanted you to be apart of my life .

I called you , 

You said im annoying .

I tried to calm you down .

But you threw me away .

Now your happy .

I think i deserve to be happy aswel .

I hope you know that you were my everything .

I hope you know .

Id die for you .

Ive changed .

Im not the same guy i was 3years ago .

All you saw in me was negativity .

All i see in you .

Is .

Gone .

Not the girl i know 2years ago .

Loving , caring , sweet and a familiar of myself  .

The women i know .

Is .

Gone .

I love you Stupid Juliet .

For that i let you go .

as you said to me before .

I should move on .

So i will .

I called you today .

to help you .

But then i relised something , i was actually helping myself .

Forever more 

Stupid Romeo / Syed Abdullah

A day with my father .

                              Today i had a wicked day with my man , abuyah . Im telling you it was weird in a way , He came back home from work , he looked tired as always , i pitty him , my father works so hard for this family . Its hard to not love him any lesser .  He's definitely my hero NO DOUBT so so so im so excited to share with you what we did today , I was being lifeless as always in my room , bored to death and pretty much clueless about how i was going to spend my day today ,at first i taught of calling Afif to take a bus and come down to JB to crash at my house for a week, but that was a total failure , since i tried to call him a few times and he didn't answer . Im sure he's doing ok though . Soo , being bored at home i suddenly relised i had a message ! It was ara , she said she was bored ! yippie ! i was happy then , cause for once she needed to to excite her life , though it ended in 3 message's , dull . But no , im not here to talk about her . so a few hours later my dad came home . Said "My son ! want to go out ?" i saw him whisper something with my mum , then my mum just when in . And i said yea sure, nothing else to do anyways . Wore my skinny jeans cause i miss wearing those and since ara wasn't here , there was pretty much no point of me not wearing skinny jeans again . When i came down my mum was like , "Abdullah you really going to wear that ?" haha i laughed . then my dad walked by and he saw me and said "Ani biar lah dia , its teenager's trend these day's , my college is 32 and still wear skinny pants at work" my mum just [sigh] and walked away ! haha . Thats my daddy ! So we when in the alza car and headed out , first we when to his shop , Oh just to let you reader's know my dad has his own shop , im not sure why he even had his own shop at the first place , all i know is he rented it off to some random people , business i guess . We were there for a while so i took advantage by asking money for top up , another rm30 and some food, after he was done , We drove to Jusco Terbrau which was close by and he said i quote " My friend baught for us tickets to watch Sucker Punch , i giggle a while and said "abuyah i already watch that with my girlfriend la!" and he was like " Eit who's your girlfriend now? you boys keep on changing girlfriends its hard for me to keep track of you!" and i said "ara la" and he was like " i taught you guys broke up?" and i said "well we have, but...[silence]" and he just grin. Once we were at Jusco our relative Mama Eka , and his husband with someone , GULPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP .

AMALLLLL ! :P

                           hoho , her name is Sharifah Amal , we used to be friend a long time ago , she lives in Singapore , i think we first meet was on Raya Eve, we kinda lost contact since friendster was dead a long time ago , so back to my story , Then amal handed us the tickets, and Mama Eka was looking and me and was like , staring at me as if she wanted me to be a man in front of my relative here , lol it wasnt like i was scared or anything ,but me and amal go way back and we had alot of catching up to do , besides i used to have a crush on her , haha and for some reason i think my dad knows . I think my dad and Mama Eka purposely brought me here to see Amal . so back to my story , after she passed me the ticket i relised that she handed my dad nothing ! and i ask Daddy, "eit ? you all not going to watch movie ?" and he  just grin ! What the fuck i said clearly , amal obviously heard it ! lol . And he said Mama eka wanted to go buy some stuff at tesco and i left alone with her , GULPPP ! Something i did not plan at all, so we when in to watch the movie with me , I gasped abit since everyone was looking at me like i was some kind of monster walking around , then i just relised SHIT , im wearing skinny jeans ! lol FAIL , then i relised people were actually looking at her more , yea she was wearing this selendang like dress , i have no idea what's it called . which high hell's and all . I was actually impressed at the way she dressed up , though i do prefer if she wore a dress , show more skin and wasnt so skinny , LOL its weird really , im not really interested in skinny girls? probly explains why i like ara so much , ok back to my story . So we were handing the ticket to watch the movie when she took the ticket from my left arm and then she tried to grab my hands , AWKWARD ALEARTTT ! i pulled my hand back though , cause i just felt wrong [please dont ask me why] so so , we when in the cinema theennn i relised she got us couple seats, GREAT  +_+" . Not what i had in mind , then i told her , ahh i already watch this movie with my gf , and she was like "you have a gf?" and i was like " wait wait xgf " i didnt want to lie right ?  lol so she smiled and we when in , the couple seats here are pretty neat you know , its like they purposely put the couple seat so close and cramp up together so the dates that was going to use the seat could cuddle , worst still  there was only one place to put the drinks ! lol wierd couple seat . So we watch the movie , nothing fishy happen there thank god , After the movie we started walking and talking, shared alot of information and keep updated of our past and stories . Shes pretty amazing , shes a nurse in Singapore General Hospital and at the same time is trying to be a doctor, pretty cool i must say . Knowing a doctor haha . Good days dont last forever , so my we catch up with my dad and he said mama aka my mum cooked dinner for us at home , so we had to head back . So as always i "salam" Mama Eka and was about to shake amal's hand like normal friends do when the most AKWARDDDD thing happen !

She took my hand and kissed it !!

Like i was so damn old , i tried to pull my hand back but it was too late , i felt so embarrass that moment my face turn red and i started to sweat abit . My dad just laughed at me . and we when back . In the car my dad asked, so how was your "date" ?  i said " ABUYAH ! IT WASN'T A DATE LAH HESH! IM STILL WITH ARA INGAT?" he pretty much ignored what i said and laugh , i guess in a way he knew i was hurting . 

God oh god, why did you bring up my old friend now , Im inlove with someone now , deeply inlove , at the same time im not sure if this person i love even has feelings towards me anymore , i cant even see any signs of her feelings or love towards me , shes changed soo soo much ! Shes not the Ara i love a long time ago . She always talks about how much other guys like her / love her and it annoys me , she knows it does . Im not sure if she can even be the ara i know again . All i know is i love her , and i hope she relises it . Atleast i have someone to acompany messaging me now , calling me , im even considering paying for Skype so i can call her through Skype . 

 

 

Ara if your reading this .

tell me you love me so i know i have you .

yours truly 

Stupid Romeo / Syed Abdullah

Forgiveness .

  

Sorry, I’m so sorry

Sorry for making you mad
Sorry for everything I said
Sorry for lying to you
Sorry, I’m so sorry

Sorry if I disappointed you
Sorry if I hurt you
Sorry for everything
Sorry, I’m so sorry

Sorry that I liked you
Sorry that you did
Sorry for turning in to a which
Sorry, I’m so sorry

Sorry that I loved you
Sorry that you didn’t
Sorry that we had to fight
Sorry, I’m so sorry

Sorry for still loving you
Sorry you don’t love me
Sorry for ever loving you
Sorry, I’m so sorry

This part of the blog of mine , is to all those people i hurt . Especially you . yes you , no not you , i mean you , not you hiding behind that wall , no not you walking towards me , no stop looking at me , its not you , behind you ! Yes you . Well we all know who im mainly trying to say sorry too . Its you Siti Faiza a.k.a Summer a.k.a Ara ? Many names you have i must admit . Im not sure which sounds better but i prefer using ara . Its simple short and easy to say out . Might you be wondering who she is ? You seriously dont know her ? Then its obvious you have not been reading my blog at all . 

There you go , Thats her .

Alright back to what i was trying to talk about here , shush you , im trying to talk ! This particular girl , im telling you has the heart of a stone cold blacksmith just looking for trouble , in a way its actually adorable . Why ? Because she is able to take shit thrown at her like our prophet and for some reason be able to still put a smile on her face . No no she's not perfect to most , She gets angry fast , likes to bite people , pinch people till your whole arm would get blue and dull . This particular girl has been through so much , so i think she deserves the biggest apology . Now why am i saying sorry at the first place ? Did i do something wrong ? "Yes" did i offend her ? "Yes" . Once my dad and friend psst "mimie"  said to me that it doesn't matter if that person forgive's you , as long you do your part . Then your forgiven . Im not the most religious person if thats what you think . Im merely a normal person who is annoying . We all know hence when we look at our self , we relise how imperfect we are, and we try to adapt and better to others . This particular girl ive known her since she was 14 . She has put an effort into protecting her life , past and family, but i was immature to ruin everything , this i have to admit , Yesterday when i talked to her , she said something that made me want to write this specific article . She said 

" Your 22 , your so close to being successful and getting a job , you think they will look at you in a bad way although you have a bad past ? No ! but me im 16 , i have a long way to go , What you did is going to ruin my life "

Right that instant , i knew she was right . She she did some silly mistake's and yes i did some silly mistakes myself before , But Ive caused so much pain for her that day by day i see her smile blooming away . Yes she has her new bf "psst, i still think im better" but i know she's still sad and alone . I wish i could be there to help her , but im not sure if im even going to be able to get that chance again . The main reason of writing this particular article is not to tell what she did , or what i did . but its to say that Im sorry, Im sorry that i was immature enough to be telling about your past, though it is your past , and i think you have change "think" , you did not deserve to be hurt like that . I wish there was something i could do to take back what i said, but during that moment , i was a different person , i was angry , jealous and hated the fact that she was not with me , flirting with others etc. I know i wont be able to take away the pain , but ill try my best to cure you and the others around you . Guys , Girls and everyone who actually takes the time to read my blog , this is what i have to say ..

"Everyone makes mistake's , from mistake we learn to not repeat the same mistake we did , Please do not judge someone without knowing them inside out, i hate it when people judge me and im sure as hell know that she would hate it aswel , you dont know me , you dont know her , so just get along with your life and im sure everything would go just fine "

sometimes it seems alot better to put on a fake smile and act cool , but we all know that cant go on forever . It hurts . I wish one day you would read my blog and relise how sorry i am for all this . If one day i get the opportunity to be together with you again "Bless me" I wont let you down , i will never ever make the same mistake , you will be proud of me . This i promise you . 

yours truly 

Stupid Romeo / Syed Abdullah

Marcus love's " A " ?

 

Guess who ?

Tough 24 March 2011 / 3.55 AM

A day that i will never forget , Today i when out to meet Stupid Juliet .

When i called her , and she said she was stressed and wanted to go watch a movie with me , i Rushed my self up ! And immediately said yes ! Although i knew in a way i was pretty much in deep crap . Cause i have no car at the moment and my money was all on the trip i was planing to go back to Johor  this week , but it was worth it i said to myself , as i quickly grabbed every penny i had in my bank , rented this Drop Dead Proton Iswara which sounded like it was going to puke every time i pressed the break . Then quickly taking my bath , gave my self a quick work out , so she could probably see that im getting buffer . aha . Wore here favorite shirt  that she used to love when i wore while going out with her , Leather jacket and my supra shoe's " sadly she doesn't like supra shoe's . She say's most Mat Rempit uses them ? where does she get this information ? haha . So back to my story . Once i was ready, i rushed out gave her a message saying i was on my way . Once there , i called her waiting for her in front of her house anxiously . when i saw her coming down , wow was i amazed ! she was wearing this beautiful white tee, black skirt with the belt around her waist , She knew that , what she wore was my favorite attire on a women ! I couldn't take my eyes of her , a minute there i felt like a pervert , her face was so red like she had been playing in the sun the whole day , Its was cute actually , made her face look like she was blushing every moment of the day . So , we were in the car heading out to watch a movie when , she said she had to go to her friends house , didn't i know though it was her boyfriends house . Bummer i said , as i peeked at what she was doing , and she would message me i quote "Told you stop watching me" she didn't even let me look at her , it was really dark so either way i couldn't see a thing really , Jealous ? yes i was . Who wouldn't be ? But i kept in mind that i had to be strong , and knew there would be a bunch of challenges awaiting me this particular day . And there was . So after she stop by at her boyfriends house doing god knows what , she when in the car with a dull face . And i asked "is everything " ok,?" She replied "yes" and i replied by saying "No its not ok , do you want to talk about it?" and "No" she said , i didn't want to push her so i just kept quite . Hence after a few minutes later we reached One Utama Plaza , we were going to watch a movie tonight . I relised that everyone was staring at us , like The whole time , people could not take their eyes of us , it was weird really , me because i was just really tall , and her probably because she has tattoo's or the fact that she was just bag-in hot !  I was blushing and happy at the same time , We bought some food and when into the cinema , She was on her phone like the whole time though , so she didnt really seem to enjoy the movie that much , she was texing and texing and texing the whole time , I didnt want to stop her , cause i figured she would not like it so i just act as if i was ignoring the whole scene but actually i was trying to peak what she was texing at the same time , Ugh to dark couldn't see anything ! i braught my face closer to her and relised something , 

The smell ! she had the same smell since we meet the first time ! her breath smell axctly the same ! i gave reason saying if she was wearing perfume but truthfully i was just wondering if i smell right . It was her mouth , and it smelled perfect . I tried holding her hands and giving her my sweater but she rejected it . Sadly . so after the movie , if my sense are right after knowing her for so so long , i smell the hint that she was in period . As she also wanted to go to the toilet right after . "bummer" i said to myself . After the movie, we when into my shitty car and i was getting ready to send her home . Then this moment, turn out so wrong i almost cried when i was sitting in the car alone after this whole scene ended . In the car , she started getting angry , Saying i took her future, destroyed it . I felt so wrong , i knew what i did was wrong . But taking the blame was also hard for me, till she said "your 22 even if you made mistakes people will forget everything since your going to be someone soon , im 16 if i make mistake people will remember it and haunt me with it " right that moment i felt so bad , i felt like i took away apart of her , and left her hanging there . I tried to say sorry , and i tried to explain but she wouldn't let me . Again i just kept quite and allow her to talk and release her anger over me . close to her house we were getting too, Then she said i quote " Ill always hate you , ill never love you , ill always have my revenge on you , one day when i be someone , ill come back and i will have my revenge" that definitely took the edge over a good ending day . Hence she said thank you for spending her for the movie and walked out . Im not sure if its the period talking or if she really ment it . But she did say something to me that make me question myself , she said " If you love someone you should not wait, instead let her go and let her be happy with her life , move on she said " with a sad face , and my heart bursting in tears . i say to myself

Is this what she really wants of me ?

yours truly

Stupid Romeo / Syed Abdullah